I still remember each detail, as if it happened only yesterday. The wooden crates in the barn, the sweet smell of bulbs, the rays of sunlight sliding through the cracks, the dust particles dancing on the floor. We were about to play Cowboys & Indians and I told Sue I was a villain, a nasty piece of work, and that She would beat the crap out of me. Her words hit me with full force: “You always want to lose!” Time slowed down and sounds faded away. She’d caught me in the act, spoke the unspeakable, exposed me to the world. I avoided Her for days, because I was scared of facing Her again. I lay in the tall grass from dawn to dusk, staring at the blue summer sky. I needed an alias, a second personality, someone without these unexplainable feelings. I shaped and carved that personality till it fitted me like a glove. A scared, submissive boy stepped into the tall grass, a smart, confident lad came out, blessed with a sharp tongue and a quick sense of humour. From now on, no one would ever know who I really was.